Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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