ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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