Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
how do flat chested girls get laid?
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I could fuck to npr.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize
