bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize