bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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