We won't sleep together?
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
