if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Text me some of your sweat
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
