in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
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