You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
