Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
