ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize
