By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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