Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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