When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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