I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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