I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
