the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
we're making bets on your personal life
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize