i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Randomize
