I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
