I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
