she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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