Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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