we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize