There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Alive.
So much puke
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
