last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
