Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
