Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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