My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
a search helicopter?!
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
