I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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