Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
