Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
