i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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