the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
