I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
