It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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