It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
