Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
only if we run a train.
done.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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