I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I'm getting married
To pizza
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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