I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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