shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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