sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize