Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Randomize
