The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
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