It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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