i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Randomize
