FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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