I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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