worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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