She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
