Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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