I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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