i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Randomize
