This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Randomize